If I had complete creative control over website copy

A while back I wrote some freelance copy for an AC Installation and Repair business. Not the most exciting topic, so I wrote the copy below to unfreeze my brain, which had refused to help me with this assignment. So what do you think -- would this copy be effective or inappropriate if actually used? 

Get Rheemed! 

Boring. Predictable. Monotonous. Normally these are not good words to describe something, but they fit Rheem air conditioning systems to a “T”. Day after day, they churn out the same, dependable service, keeping your home cool without you giving it a thought. You’ll even be bored by the monthly power bills. Sure, at first you’ll absolutely love opening the envelope and seeing how much lower your bill is. You may even show your spouse, kids, neighbors and co-workers for the first few months. But eventually, like most owners of a new Rheem system, you’ll resort to opening those statements with a yawn. Same old low power bills, month after month.

During your first summer with a Rheem on duty, you might think you’re hearing is going. That constant drone of the old unit chugging away night and day will be replaced by a quieter, more intermittent sound of a new, energy efficient AC silently beating back the subtropical heat that Florida is well known for. Gone will be the excitement of varying temperatures from room to room. The right system for your home will cool each room evenly, so that eventually you’ll forget to bring your sweater into the living room because it’s no longer 10 degrees cooler than the rest of the house.

One thing we ask you not to forget is your ABC Air Conditioning installer. Our guys love Rheems so much, well, they get a little attached to the units during the installation process. Listen closely and you might hear them talk to it, even calling it by name, like “Betty” or “Hoss”. Watch closely during the paperwork signing, and you might catch their eyes watering a little, because they know they’re not going to see Betty or Hoss for years and years. 

Sure, we recommend annual maintenance to keep your Rheem air conditioner running in tip-top shape, but they run so well that we know you most likely won’t call until something goes wrong. And it will – even the best air conditioners eventually need an assist. When that day comes, pull out your ABC Air Conditioning paperwork and ask for the installer by name, so that he (or she. We could have a female installer on our staff, eventually, but so far we’ve learned that women are smart enough to find better work) can come back and see an old friend. Better yet, go ahead and get that maintenance package, so that your family, your Rheem, and your installer will all be happy for years to come.